Chinglish

You might like this. This is hilarious... even an Englishman could not construct sentences using numeric, which is exclusive only to Malaysians and Singaporeans.

Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with...

1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to peep. But the couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away.

So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 ! and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also asks me to climb a 3 and jump down.

I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.

Dear Ah Lian,

Thanks you for your letter.

Wrong time no see you.

How everything?

For me, I am quiet find.

You say in your letter your taukeh soh want you to chain your look?

Some more you must wear kick kok soo, hope you can wok popperly and lont fall down.

You know, Ah Kau Kia working in a big Myco soft where company now.

Last week, he take I, Kutty boy, Lo Tuck & few of his flend to May Nonut to eat barger.

After that he take we all go to kalah ok.

Kutty boy sing and sing no stop until the sky bright & Lo Tuck fell a sleep hole nite long in kalah ok long sofar.

Next week, my father mother going to sellerbread 20 years annie wear sari.

My father mother going to give a fist to all the kampong people.

So you must come with your hole family.

I only hope one day we no need to write and send letter to you and to me.

Better I e-meow you, you e-meow me.

I will ketchup with you soon.

And when you got time, please few free to call me.

Goo bye.....

Worm regard,


Ah Beng

Once upon a time, a group of Ah Bengs stepped into a lounge and wanted the DJ to play the song 'Ah Cheng Buey Ro Ti' (In Hokkien means Ah Cheng buys bread).

The DJ told them that they only have English songs and told them to re-select another song.

The Ah Bengs were very angry and kicked up a big fuss, claiming the DJ was insulting them.

The manager had to intervene in order to calm them down.

Finally, after long talk with Ah Bengs, the manager found out that Ah Bengs actually asking for the song 'Unchained Melody' by the Righteous Brothers.

LOL! Sigh. I like Chinglish jokes.

Unchained Melody is nice~
(Both the song and the joke)

Really? I had no idea. Honestly.

Anyway, did anyone get what the letter (The right way to speak ah moh) was saying? I got a headache reading it and a stomachache later (for laughing too hard).

you know what kills me?

......Ah Beng

I have a friend with that name.

Are you still alive then?